This film is about Mildred (Rowlands), an elderly woman with a kind heart and mother instincts. But when her own daughter finally goes out into the world, she is left with the same predicament that many parents who spend much of their lives with children have-- no one left to care for. That is, until she finds Monica (Tomei), a young mother who's dirty bag husband leaves her to take care of and provide for her son, J.J. As the relationship grows between the two, Mildred and Monica, in typical fashion, learn from one another.
Now this is a movie back from 1996 when I was around six or seven years old. But man, did I love this movie even back then. I know I mainly write about movies I like and why, and I promise that soon I will get to something I hate with a passion, but for now, deal with me.
The movie starts off showing that Mildred, or Millie, is indeed too kind for her own good and often stepped all over as she goes about doing her daughters paper route early in the morning moaning "the last time... really the last time" showing she had done it multiple times before. I personally love Gena Rowlands and see her as a mothering figure in real life, but having read things of her off screen, as good of a mom as she was, she wouldn't be that type of push over outside the movie world! But she plays the character with the beauty and grace only an older actress, and real mother, can accomplish.
Mildred's daughter is one of the "irresponsible and free spirit" types that didn't want to go to school. She disrespects her mother and I hate that type of character because it is to close to how people treat their parents nowadays and for a long time now, without respect or gratitude.
The first time you see Monica she is getting ready for work, walking out on her husband who comes out of his house nearly naked. They are fighting, probably with their son watching from a window or something, yelling and screaming, cussing and bad mouthing each other. Marisa though, man.. I do not miss seeing her with blonde hair. She pulls it off, but barely in my opinion.
Anyway, Millie's daughter leaves with her boyfriend. Obviously a bad idea from the start since its practically running away from her problems, but Millie hugs her even through her yelling, telling her good luck and that she still loves her. Then the boyfriend actually has the nerve to come in after the daughter walks out and tells Millie that he's sorry about it all, that he didn't want to get in the middle of it and to 'take it easy'. I mean really? Then why even go inside and talk to her at all?
Well, Monica shows up early the next morning after her night at work while Millie is delivering her daughters last set of papers. She nearly crashes into the house, drunk and is yanked inside by her husband who has obviously been brutal to her before with the fear in her eyes. But let's face it, Monica is obviously not an A+ parent herself what with the drinking and all.
Anyway, the next morning or later that morning, unsure, Monica comes over all bruised up, ringing Millie's doorbell. Apparently, since they are neighbors, she figured she could come over and burden the neighbor lady. Well, she says her jerk of a husband left town and she needs her to look over J.J so she can go to work since she works the split shift. J.J is a very quiet boy who eventually opens up to both Millie and his mom.
Quick note, too, that this was the boy who played J.J.'s first film, Jake Lloyd. He did a great job, even merely being quiet. He stopped acting, or so it seems in 2005 but can be seen in movies like Jingle All The Way, Madison, and the voice of Anakin Skywalker in the Star Wars video games following his feature as Anakin Skywalker in Phantom Menace.
Back to the movie, Millie eventually keeps watching J.J. taking him to and picking him up from school so his mother doesn't send him off to his grandmother.
Well, it is revealed later that Millie also has a son who is married. They come over for Thanksgiving and he seems to be more of a snobby but loving son. You can at least tell this one appreciates his mother. Her daughter however, does not show up. Monica comes over and announces she can not stay, that she has a date, but the look on her poor sons face just makes me wanna cry. Why not spend the holiday with her son??
Well, the phone rings for Monica 'cause she obviously thought it was okay to forward her calls to her neighbor, and he dumps her on her date. Well, Millies son announces that he got an offer for a new job but its in a different state. He offers to take Millie with him and his wife, so they can be close since his sister is no longer around. She says yes, but because she says yes, her son suddenly turns around and says that she needs to take her time to think about it and not rush into the decisions. This shows me that although he cares about his mother and wants to make the good gesture of inviting his mother out to stay with him, once she says yes, he is thinking "oh crap, I didn't think she would leave her long term home, memories, and actually want to come to a nice city with good weather and beautiful scenery". Some son, in the end, right?
Then, after J.J's birthday when he gets bike from his "Auntie Mildred", he gets to take over the paper route that was once his daughters, to make a little extra money for himself.
I do think the character Monica is a strong willed one though despite her failed attempts at trying to prove she is the perfect mom. She makes mistakes but when her husband comes back, telling her that she is the only one for him from outside the house as she hides behind the front door, she doesn't give in. She knows hes bad for her and remains quiet, proving she can make the best choices when they really count.
One night, Monica gets a babysitter and decides to take Mildred, the perfect house wife, out on the town. To a rowdy bar where she is used to drinking. Wow. It must have been terribly awkward for her. However, she does pick fun at the fact that when her husband was alive in her younger days she could drink more then him and "he was a very large man". Haha, I think it is cute the way she tries to fit in to everything. She tries so hard to make everyone her friend. Well, at this bar she meets a large, exotic german.. or Russian.. I think German, who is one of Monica's friends. He is young, maybe in his late thirties, early forties, but can't help but stare at her like hes in love. This makes her think about her age and wonder what could someone see in her. I think this part actually opens her up a little more which is important to her character.
In the bar scene, Monica says she still loves her husband. But if he hit her once he will keep doing it and she can't have that. So she has been busting him trying to punish him so that when she does accept him back, if he does, he won't do it again. Mildred tells her that love is like a weed. Temporary but if its there it is easy to ignore. If you really try though, you can get rid of it for good, and it won't come back.
Later, Mildred goes out to see her son who has accepted the job in San Fran and through discussion has decided that if his mom likes it out there, to keep her eye open for a place in case she wants to move out there. He even shows her that the full upstairs of their new condo can be hers. Bathroom, bedrooms. I can not make this guy out. I know he loves his mother but would he really be happy if she said yes and moved out there? Or is it another ploy just to be the good and perfect son? Ugh, I hate unreadable types. Then at lunch they reveal that her son's wife is pregnant and that she will be a grandmother. Then, the real motive is revealed in the kindest way her son can. She can move out and help because his wife knows nothing about babies. When Mildred realizes this, she says no. I gotta hand it to her for the lesson building motherhood. She claims she doesn't think she could handle anymore babies right now, and as honest and loving as the wife seems to be in understanding it, her son takes it badly and Mildred basically says she gave him too much attention growing up and spoiled him into getting his way. He can't understand why she doesn't want to move out and help them, instead stay where she is helping the woman he calls a "Tramp" and her kid. Mildred knows why.. cause they need her more.
When Mildred returns, Monica has her husband back after taking Mildred's advice. They are going to try it again because J.J needs a father and tells Mildred that she is off the hook for watching him. She says Mildred still can if she wants, but Mildred understand that the boy needs his father and understands that she might not always be needed by someone, or the right someone.
In not being needed anymore, Mildred heads back to a bar, taking solace in a drink or two. Double Vodka Martini being her drink of choice. It is slowly revealed that maybe she wasn't the best in the attitude department when she was drinking. Having no one to care for, she slowly dwindles back into the alcohol world, yearning for the need to be wanted.
One night she comes home after drinking, her daughter sitting in her living room in the dark and tells her mother that she wants to come home. She got a job, and is beginning to grow up. Mildred tells her that she is selling the house after getting an offer and Mildred tells her that the house is a part of her past that she has held onto for a long time. When asked what she is going to do, Mildred says she doesn't know. Her daughter leaves, peaceful in the fact that things are going to change.
Near the end, things seem to be going good for Monica. Her and her husband are finally working while Mildred is busy packing and about ready to leave her beautiful house. Man.. I really want this house. Well, Monica is talking and talking trying to keep herself from getting emotional over Mildred leaving. It's a touching scene that makes you want to cry over the pure aspect of it. J.J and his dad come over so J.J can her can talk, he can say his goodbyes, both parents worried that their little boy won't be able to take it. He sits down with her and tell her thank you for being there for him and his mom. She tells him he doesn't have to say anything if he doesn't want to, because she knows how he feels and he knows how she feels, that she loves him. When he asks if he is ever going to see her again, she says "I sure hope so". I love this part because knowing that this little boy is in his first movie, he plays this part so well and so heart breaking at the loss of his Auntie Mildred. Sitting in the back yard, reminiscing over memories, he stares at her and after a while says "Well, goodbye." like a real grown up man, and he runs off. How can that not break your heart?
Standing outside the moving truck, Monica and Mildred share their last moments together. Monica gets teary eyed, knowing how much this woman truly helped her and her family.
Mildred's daughter takes Mildred to the airport, leaving her daughter with some money, and not one word as to where she is going. Miami, San Fran. It is a mystery that only Millie knows about.
In the end, that is where it all matters. When you see these two woman who have grown and grown together. One taking off on her own, the other becoming more responsible and a better mother. They helped each other. There was real chemistry in the cast and the movie couldn't have ended better with the symbolism that everything will be okay but as much as we don't always want them to, change happens and sometimes its our choice that it does.
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